Longread – Lame excuses regarding plus-size

I’m surrounded with plus-size on the internet, particularly the blogosphere. I will, for the most part, silently roll my eyes and very rarely comment on a blog. It’s very rare to find a blog entry revolving about plus-size that I find worthwhile and mostly, the entries just make me either wanna scratch my eyes out or call the blogger on their hypocrisy. The amount of lame excuses is enormous when it comes to plus-size and that  goes for both sides of the equation: the plus-sized people saying you should be proud and the skinny people saying fat is unhealthy. So I’m gonna give the blogosphere my take on the excuses of both sides that, from my point of view, are the lamest.

Since I’m plus-sized myself, I’m arbitrarily choosing to “attack” the fat-shamers first (lest I be accused of being a self-loather by the other plus-sized people)

“Just put the fork down! It’s that easy!”

Oh really? Because that’s something you’ve ever had to force yourself to? No? You never had to force yourself to do it? Maybe because it’s easier for you than for other people? This is the comment that, while not 100% inaccurate, makes me roll the eyes the most. If it was really that easy, there would be close to no fat people in the world. But you truly must illuminated or something. Or maybe you’re not that illuminated, if you’re unaware that inability to deal with emotional problems are a big part of the problem and all.

“My parents are both overweight just like me, so it must be genetic.”

Unless you’re a rat in a lab, that’s highly unlikely. It reminds me of the joke of a Doctors’ facebook group that goes “Obesity doesn’t run in the family. The problem is, no one runs in the family”. Genes aren’t the only thing you can pass along: bad habits are way up there too.

Same goes for the “conditions” and medications that make you fat. It’s true, once you figure out what’s causing it and fix it, the metabolism rate will stabilize, not over-accelerate. Which means you’ll stop gaining weight but won’t actually lose the weight you gained. Yeah sucks to be you, but even with an ongoin medical problem,. the weight loss is just harder, not impossible. I’m not telling you you should be happy about it. I’m not even gonna tell you to lose the extra weight. But the next time someone tells you to put the fork down, maybe consider telling them to screw off instead of playing victim?

“we need to stop promoting unhealthy life-styles”

Actually, the only thing we keep promoting is superficiality and overselling looks – the average consumer just grew up with the notion that superficiality is bad so he turned the focus of the looks towards health. Everyone is still buying into one form or the other of “being unhealthy”- the overly skinny and the overly fat. Don’t bother trying to tell me it has anything to do with health. If you insist upon it, google orthorexia – we have found an extreme right in the middle of everything! Mankind – we are that good! HOLY COW!

“You can be fat and healthy.”

Sure thing. Fat people just usually aren’t. Doing yoga and posting it on youtube is definitely very awesome and it makes me very jealous (I’m more the “skip-the-bus-and-walk-the-8-bus-stops-instead” kind of person) but it doesn’t necessarily make you healthy. And yes, my skinny sister who has a fatty liver because her sparse bodyfat decided to say “F*** your thighs, I’m hitting your liver first!” is kinda screwed, but she is also the exception. And why is everyone so obsessed with health around food anyway? Could it be another attempt to legitimize your very own opinion of what is beautiful? Hmmmm…. bonus round: this actually went both ways.

“Fat people are just unattractive.”

No problem, look at skinny people. There a lack of naked skinny people around you, honeyboy/girl?

“Real women have curves”

Yes they do – sometimes in the most perfect body parts, sometimes in the most obnoxious body parts. But there are plenty of real women with no curves. Those skinny models are real women too, ya know?

Personal afterthought:

I’m never gonna be proud of being fat. Because, here’s a funny little story, I’m only proud of achievements, and gaining weight was not one of the things I worked at in my life, go figure! I also can lose a ton of weight over the years and still feel antagonized by the war of the BMIs (as if the war of the sexes weren’t enough!) because, like a lolcat once said: what has been seen cannot be unseen!

I’m also never gonna be ashamed of being fat. When naked in front of a mirror, you’ll most likely find me poking my belly and saying “boing! boing! boing!” – ya know, not something I would do at the supermarket, but far from crouching in a corner and crying.

I’m quite sure anyone who reads this and regularly uses one of these excuses will not change their minds and be quite baffled and pissed off at “how dense she is”. But maybe, just maybe, a couple of bloggers will see themselves in this entry and like it and comment or even share. And that would be more than ok, that would be perfectly awesome.

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Dear fellows formerly known as the fat-chicks of the world…

…aka plus-sizes. I have a very high BMI and wear an US size 26 (EU54). Now let me show you something.

Here is self-loathing.

Here is adoring yourself.

Look how much friggin’ room there is inbetween! Look at it!! It might have been wider if not for the menus on the right, etc., but you get the picture. Now, having said that, here’s my take on this situation.

Some time ago, someone came up with the ridiculous notion that models aren’t coat-hangers to display clothes on a runway and that they’re supposed to be pretty. But they are not supposed to be pretty, they’re not the main focus of a runway show, the clothes are. But around the same time that teenagers started describing their teenager peers as “societey”, the ridiculous notion that models should be a role-modeld to anyone rather than a twig for one-size-fits-all-couture somehow seems to have clung to the other boogey-man: the “mass media”.

In a time where bad-parenting is a constant accusation and teachers are to blame if the kids just won’t learn anything, somehow these emaciated total strangers are made responsible for the self-esteem of the women in general (but men are tough. They’re never insecure, f*** ’em! Let’s make it all about women again. We’re the 50% minority)

And I, as a fat woman, am expected to hate these models as if they had tied me to the chair and force-fed me like a foie gras goose. Well, screw you, that’s what I have got to say that. People who say beauty comes in all shapes and sizes are usually more than happy to disregard any slender-shape as unnatractive, unhealthy garbage. I hate both that notion and the notion that, gosh darn it, you just have to be beautiful! Because f*** inner values!

No, beauty comes first! Those models were right all along, they just had the wrong size! Hmmm…. No thanks.

Those skinny teenagers making duckface and taking selfies in front of the mirror look ridiculous, but somehow, a fat adult woman making pouty faces and taking selfies in front of the mirror was just what this world was missing! Let’s make it aaaaall about appearences! Well, I’m all for being sexy and feeling ok in your skin, but this is ridiculous! Are we willing to focus on looks this much?

I’d love to dress up a bit more (spare a dime, sister?), and I truly am thankful for the few plus-sized models showing up. This means the companies are finally noticing how much money they can make off of us plus-sizes (you thought the fashion industry was changing their views about beauty? Seriously?) and that is finally ensuring that there are more and more high-quality plus-sized clothing available every day!I  do check plus-size fashion blogs, but I refuse to parade around like a vain kid, especially on the internet. Beauty is a part of my life, but it is ONE part, and not even the biggest. I’m not vain.